Wankerism Run Amuck

I know that it seems that all I ever do is complain about the drivers over here. (Well it would if that is the only entries that you ever read...) But I have to do it again! What the hell is wrong with some people? Three times today I have had somebody act like an absolute and total tosser as I rode my bike on the clearly marked bicycle lanes.

The first time was as I was riding east in the cycle lane along The Portsmouth Road into Kingston. I was riding along and the driver of a trade van swung into my lane from the on-coming traffic lane to pass a car that was parked obstructing his lane.

Trouble is, that in doing so, he (White Van Man) not only obstructed the eastbound traffic lane but also the entire bicycle lane. Now, I could understand this had he then decided to get back into his lane. But as there was another car about ten yards behind me also obstructing his lane, he decided to pass them both without getting back into his own lane.

I came to a stop and waited for him to get back into his lane and he yelled at me through his windscreen. Traffic stopped behind both sides of our little Mexican Standoff. (Though being that we are in London, I guess this would be a British Standoff.) Eventually, he did return to his lane, allow the traffic that had queued behind us to pass in our lanes and then he (presumably) went on his way.

The second time that someone was a wanker to me was as I was riding down Victoria avenue (again, well within the marked bicycle lane) this prig comes up behind me and noisily screeches his brakes. He then gunned his engine, and then (with an unnecessary surfeit of noise) passes me, wildly slewing into the approaching traffic lanes in the process.

The first of these two incidents I have to ascribe to being an asshole and a buffoon, too lazy to turn the wheel and get back into his own lane for the thirty yards between the two cars in his lane. The second, I can only ascribe to being either a yob or a completely incompetent driver.

The last, is creditable to children trying to be funny. On this one, I was riding back to the office along St. Leonard's road when these two kids (don't ask me why they weren't in school!) decided to cross the street. One of them (without looking) stepped off the curb into my path. I swerved to the right to miss him and he ran in front of me. I dodged to the left to miss him and the second one decides now is the time to step off the curb. I applied the brakes and stopped to allow them to cross the street. The laughed, said "sorry, geezer" and slouched along their merry way.

I guess it could be worse. I could have been run off the road at any point this afternoon.

I hope that wherever you are today, you have something you can be thankful for!

Don Bergquist - 13 September 2006 - Thames Ditton, Surrey, UK