Monday, November 28, 2011

Travelogue South Carolina – In Transit

If there is anyone who truly believes that the travel industry has been set-up to cater to our comfort, I would love to meet them. Whenever I travel, I remember a cartoon from that classic of childhood, MAD MAGAZINE.

The item was in one of their articles about the truth behind advertising claims. The article was structured so that it showed you what the ad claimed and then in the next set of frames it showed you the truth behind the claim. This strip was about the airline commercials of the day; the ones that claimed that air travel was glamorous. It showed a lovely woman and a handsome man luxuriating in enormous reclining chairs; their every whim being catered to. They were served flutes of Champaign, whole roast chickens and enormous steaks. Generally, they were just having an excellent time flying.

Then, in the next set of frames you saw that these models were, in fact, being shot to hide the fact that they were little people. The rest of the people on the plane, being something approaching the societal averages, were crammed into seats that were much more realistically proportioned, being served thimble-sized glasses of beverages, and miniature food that would look more apropos on the table in a doll’s house.

Granted, I am a bit above the societal norm, being that I am well over six feet tall, that I am built much like a football linebacker, and that my knees generally press into the backs of the seat in front of me on the average airplane. But the plane that I flew here on was small even by standards of modern air travel.

The plane, a 21-seat commuter plane, was not tall enough in the center of the main aisle for me to stand upright. Luckily, my ability to plan ahead and my premier status with the airline meant that I could snag the first seat on the plane. I had a skosh more legroom and a short hunker into and out of the plane.

Even though we have just flown half-way across the country in a commuter jet, we made good time and I have only two hours to wait for my flight home. Unfortunately, there is no earlier flight to Denver. (I checked in at the service desk as I walked past it… The next flight is the one I am on; I guess that two hours is not too long to wait. Not that the trip itself wasn’t a good one, but I am so ready for this trip to be over!

Wherever you are today I hope that you're getting closer to home!

Don Bergquist – November 28, 2011 – Houston, Texas, USA

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