Fox News Gets It Right!

Well, folks, it is Faint and Fall Over time! Fox news has apparently gotten one right!

I was sent this image by a friend of mine. I cannot attest to the veracity of the attribution, but it was apparently used in a recent press conference where the president called Hurricane Katrina "One of the worst disasters ever to hit the United States."

According to the email that this came in, Fox used the standard shorthand of using a colon after the name of the person speaking followed by the quite (or some shortened version of the quote) to state that the speaker had said something of note. Unfortunately for Fox, the meaning gets lost if you do not understand the convention. Is the president calling Katrina a disaster? Is Fox calling Bush a disaster?

Is either one of these meetings really wrong?

Have a great day!

Don Bergquist - 15, September, 2005 - Denver, Colorado

Book Report - Tricky Business

Last week's reading selection was Tricky Business by Dave Barry

About the Author: David Barry, Jr. (born July 3, 1947) is a bestselling author and Pulitzer Prize-winning humorist, who wrote a nationally syndicated column for the Miami, Florida newspaper, The Miami Herald, from 1983 to January, 2005. His other books include: Big Trouble, The Only Travel Guide You'll Ever Need, and Dave Barry is not Making this up!

About the book: The plot of the book revolves around an unsavory group of people who run an ocean-going casino boat and use it for nefarious deeds. Being that the setting is Miami, you can count on those deeds involving murder, drugs, and guns. Dave makes sure to warn the reader that this book, like his last, has some bad people in it and bad people say and do bad things. If you don't want to read about bad things, don't read the book!

One of my favorite parts of the book was the running gag that is constantly returned to about the television station that keeps losing the reports that are out over-hyping the story of the storm. It reminded me of the coverage of the storm this summer when CNN sent out their reporters to stand in the storm to tell us that it was blowing out there.

On my rating scale of up to five bus transfers, I rate this book five transfers. I thoroughly enjoyed the tale and it kept me turning pages all the way into downtown!

I hope that wherever you are, your day is smooth sailing!

(This week I am reading The Fandom of the Operator by Robert Rankin.)

Don Bergquist - 14, November, 2005 - Lakewood, Colorado

I Rant About Your Rides

Who really needs an SUV?

On this, the fourth anniversary of 09/11, I feel it is my duty as a patriotic citizen of the United States of America to introduce my grass-roots drive to abolish, outlaw, spurn, and otherwise drive out of the marketplace (pun intended) SUVs.

There are plenty of reasons why SUVs should be removed from the American road. Let's start with the moron factor. The moment most people get behind the wheel of a California God-Mobile, they become complete and utter morons. They have earned the name California God-Mobile because here in Colorado if you see one with a California tag on it get away! Fast!! Nine times out of ten, the person behind the wheel will apparently be under the belief that the laws of space-time physics to not apply to them. The light that we all saw as red, they saw as green. That ice they are approaching (probably to brake upon) gives them no fear. They are certain that the surface we see as slick and without traction will be as easy to navigate for them as one made of the coarsest sandpaper.

Then there is the safety factor. I mean, sure... you've got six tons of steel surrounding you. Goody for you! But that six tons of steel is something like eight feet tall and on a precariously small wheelbase, it is too easy to move the center of gravity of all that steel out of over the wheelbase. Simple physics tells you that makes it unstable and easy to tip. ...and with all that inertia behind you, once it starts to tip there'll be no stopping it.

Oh, and before you tell me how safe they are for you, the driver, skip it! There is more than enough research to debunk that theory. You can check with Consumer Reports if you do not believe me. Why else would the insurance industry charge such a premium on the insurance for them?

Then there is the economy factor. The dependence of oil is driving this country to invade (on trumped-up charges) sovereign nations. Does this not bother you? Alternatively, are you a Fox News Channel watching slope-headed Neanderthal who actually believes that the administration has not actively mislead us so that they could invade Iraq? Even if you do buy into the reason for invading Iraq, even the president says we need to decrease our dependence on foreign oil. Driving a vehicle that gets, what - six miles to the gallon(?) - is no way to decrease our dependency on foreign oil.

Nevertheless, even if we do not use any of these to support the removal of these behemoths from the road, let's look at it from a safety issue of the other drivers on the road. SUVs are a self-propagating blight. Most of the people that I have asked about why they drive an SUV say it is for the safety, or because other people are driving them. A few are actually driving them because they have lots of cargo and crew that they need to haul. Most of the SUVs on the road are being conducted by their driver for their driver alone. Therefore, we have all these huge vehicles surrounding smaller, more environmentally responsible vehicles on the road.

I don't know about you, but my Drivers' Ed classes taught me to keep an eye on the road ahead. It was recommended at that time to look through the car ahead of you to anticipate what was coming. It is pretty hard to look through the car ahead of you when seated behind the wheel of a car when you probably couldn't see through it if you were standing up! So aside from all the other problems SUVs restrict the visibility of the road from everyone else.

You may be wondering what brought about this screed today. Well, I took a drive today and was astounded by the sheer number of these goliath vehicles on the road today. It was easily a four-to-one ratio on the intestate as I went up into the mountains. It was not easy to ignore how many there were.

I hope your day is going well and you have a clear view of the road ahead.

Don Bergquist - 11-September-2005 - Lakewood, Colorado

Sunrise at Lakewood, Colorado

Another Exquisite Sunrise at Lakewood, Colorado

For some reason we have been having a string of spectacular sunrises for the past week or so!

I hope that your day is going well wherever you are!

Don Bergquist - 08-September-2005 - Lakewood, Colorado

Book Report - Tricky Business

Last week's reading selection was Making History by Stephen Fry

In places I could not put this book down! One day last week I even walked from the Civic Center Station to my office (about eight blocks) with my nose in the book the entire way! I applaud Mr. Fry for some of his more astute observations on the interplay of historical events. I was slightly disappointed at the ease with which I guessed some of the "shocker" moments but I do tend to keep things loaded in memory as I read so I do tend to find myself flipping backward in a book as I am reading it to make sure that the little events are with me as I move through the story. For that reason, I picked up on a number of the foreshadowing events that spoiled a couple of the "Ah-Hah Moments" for me.

I give this four bus transfers out of a possible five. And it was only the predictability of some of the moments that kept it to four.

This week's reading selection is Tricky Business by Dave Barry

About the Author:

David Barry, Jr. (born July 3, 1947) is a bestselling author and Pulitzer Prize-winning humorist who wrote a nationally syndicated column for the Miami, Florida newspaper, The Miami Herald, from 1983 to January, 2005. His other books include: Big Trouble, The Only Travel Guide You'll Ever Need, and Dave Barry is not Making this up!

About the book:

The plot of the book revolves around an unsavory group of people who run an ocean-going casino boat and use it for nefarious deeds. Being that the setting is Miami, you can count on those deeds involving murder, drugs, and guns.

Dave makes sure to warn the reader that this book, like his last, has some bad people in it and bad people say and do bad things. If you don't want to read about bad things, don't read the book!

Well past the mid-point of the book I would definitely recommend it.

I hope that wherever you are, your day is smooth sailing!

Don Bergquist - 07-September-2005 - Lakewood, Colorado

Sunrise

Okay, so I had to do another blog entry today because it was such a lovely sunrise that I could not help but get out my camera and take some pictures. When I exited my home, the sky was ablaze with orange and gold and purple and pink. It was spectacular. I crossed the street to the bus stop and grabbed my camera and took the shots you will find by following the link above. This is one of the reasons I love living in Colorado! There is such great scenery here!

I hope that wherever you are, your morning (and your day) is spectacular!

Don Bergquist - 06-September-2005 - Lakewood, Colorado

A Day at the Spa

Today I decided it was time to take some time to pamper myself and take some time to do something nice about me. Okay, so the decision was prompted by being pretty good all weekend and getting a lot done at home.

Friday I went out to get parts to replace the belts on my vacuum cleaner and then, while I had it apart, I also went to clean-out the tubes that had become more-or-less packed with Saga's hair. (Saga projectile sheds. She can walk through a room and it will be covered with hair. I go through a large number of vacuum bags just getting her hair off the floor!) With the vacuum tuned-up I gave the first floor a thorough cleaning, moving all the furniture and even breaking out the shampooer and deep cleaning the carpets.

Saturday was more of the same. I finished the carpets on the stairs and upstairs and then made sure the vacuum was free of hair again and went-on to doing my bookkeeping. Suffice it to say, by Sunday with a spanky-clean home and a beautiful day unfolding ahead of me, I decided to head-up to the Indian Springs Spa up in Idaho Springs. I brought a book and decided to get a pool and cave pass to treat myself to a day of relaxation.

It would have been a bit more relaxing had there not been quite so many children there, screaming, crying, and splashing each other, but the day was still relaxing. The cave baths are geothermal springs that are fed into caves that have been bored out of the side of the mountain. There are a number of tubs in the caves filled with the hot mineral water. The entire tunnel is steamy because of all the hot water so it is like a spa inside a sauna. It is dark, quite, warm and relaxing in the caves. I started there.

After luxuriating a bit in the hot water, I headed with my book up to the pool to cool off a bit and to do some reading. It was okay, but being a weekend the pool was filled with families. To be fair, most of the children there were well behaved. But the little girl who took a proprietary view of the stairs; throwing her body across the steps so that nobody could leave or exit the pool and moving as you tried to circumnavigate her, I could have done without. When I finally decided to just step over her, her mother, who had been watching this entire exchange grabbed her brat, pulled her away from me with a scornful look at me and told the kid in Spanish to "come away from that man." I later saw her (the mother) talking to some guy (her husband?) and pointing at me. Oh well. Some people cannot deal with the fact that their children are brats.

After an afternoon of reading (with an occasional dip into the pool) I headed down for one more steam/soak in the caves and then dressed and headed out to dinner at a local salad bar restaurant. It was a thoroughly relaxing day. When I returned home, Saga was glad to see me and curled-up in my lap on the hanging chair on the deck as enjoyed the cool evening.

I wonder what I will do to top this tomorrow.

I hope that your day was as relaxing!

Don Bergquist - 04-September-2005 - Lakewood, Colorado

Book Report - Making History

This week's reading selection is Making History by Stephen Fry

About the Author:

Stephen Fry is a British Author, comedian, actor, and director. His other books include: The Liar, The Hippopotamus, and The Stars' Tennis Balls. His television credits include The Black Adder, and Jeeves and Wooster.

About the book:

The plot is straight-forward enough. A doctoral candidate at Cambridge is attempting to get his dissertation, which concerns the early life of Adolph Hitler, accepted so that he can get on with the next part of his life; the high-excitement of professorship at St. Matthew's College, Cambridge. That is until his life takes a tragic turn that begins when his girlfriend leaves him.

The plot involves time travel and changing history. The novel is divided into two books the first concerning "real" history and the second concerning and alternative history in which Hitler had never been born. Although the subject matter is a bit dark, the book (thus far) is well written and treated in a wonderfully humorous manner that has given me many a chuckle this far.

At the mid-point of the book I would recommend it.

Don Bergquist - 31-August-2005 - Lakewood, Colorado

Book Report (A New Feature)

This week, I have decided to start a new feature on my blog; a feature I am calling "Book Report."

Now that I am riding the bus to work I have a lot more time to read. At least I have more time that I am not doing anything else that enables me to spend more time reading. I think that these book reports will be a nice way for me to review the books that I am reading and to allow you to get to know something of my literary taste. (...or lack thereof as the case may be.)

Yes, I am doing my civic duty to keep petroleum usage down - I have been taking the bus since I got back from London the last time... before t hit three-dollars-a-gallon to top-up the tank. It is not so much the cost of gas, my car doesn't burn that much anyway, but it is a relief not having to drive into town every day.

So, every Wednesday I plan to present you with a book report on the reading material I have chosen for the bus that week. I have selected a new book and will report on in on Wednesday. Last week, I completed Stranger in a Strange Land by Robert A. Heinlein. I really enjoyed it but, then I had read it before a long time ago.

It is a very though provoking novel. The novel discusses topics of belief, behavior and custom. Valentine Michael Smith is the only survivor of the first manned mission to Mars. He is the son of the captain of the ship and the wife of the ship's doctor. When all the adults in the crew die of unknown causes, Smith is adopted by the Martians. Twenty-six years later he is discovered by the crew of the second manned mission to Mars.

The novel concerns itself with Smith's integration to the Human society which he has never know he was a part of.

I hope you will enjoy these reports and that it encourages you to read some of the books I have shared with you. If you'd care to comment on my reading selections, please either comment the entries (to share your thoughts with others) or click the email link to send me your feedback.

Don Bergquist - 29-August-2005 - Lakewood, Colorado

New Day Dawning

Blues Traveler Makes the following observation:

Some day an answer will find us
Quite a long shot, but anyway
I think the past, the past is behind us
Be real confusing if not, but anyway
I put all my hope in tomorrow
It's gonna be great, I can tell but anyway
I see a new, a new day a dawning
I like to sleep late, oh well, but anyway

I have always liked that song and the fact that I have a morning shot (yes, another one!) on my page this week is what made me think of it.

There were a number of new starts this week. I started taking Saga to the dog wash instead of the groomer. Saga doesn't like the groomer and I am not sure that I like sending her there. With my torn ACL, kneeling at the edge of the tub doesn't really work either. So we went to the Dog Wash on Saturday.

The Dog Wash is an enclosed room inside a local pet store that has perhaps half a dozen elevated tubs and grooming tables. For a small fee, the user can bring in their dog, wash, dry, and groom them. They provide the shampoo, the conditioner, the towels, and the driers and brushes. It is pretty cool.

Other than that, I took a morning hike. It is getting cool enough in the morning and decided that I like walking in the mornings before sunrise again. I am going to make time in my schedule to do so. It had kind-of fallen off when I started working with the UK office and started checking email at 04:30 each morning. I am now going to work later so I can resume my morning hikes with Saga.

That's about it for this week. Perhaps there will be more new starts soon! If so, I'll write about them here later. But anyway...

I hope you have a great day!

Don Bergquist - 28-August-2005 - Lakewood, CO

My Time of the Day

My time of day is the dark time,
A couple of deals before dawn,
When the street belongs to the cop,
And the janitor with the mop,
And the grocery-clerks are all gone.
When the smell of the rain-washed pavement,
Comes up clean and fresh and cold.
And the street lamp light,
Fills the gutter with gold,
That's my time of day-
My time of day

Okay, it is from the musical "Guys and Dolls" but it is still appropriate. I love the early morning. This morning, as I was walking Saga in the park across the street, the sun was just about to crest the horizon, there was a thin layer of valley fog blanketing the park. The temperatures were mild, but not really cold; you can tell that fall is on its way!

I love this time of the year! The sun comes up enough to enjoy having breakfast in the garden and it is cool enough to enjoy lingering over my coffee but it is not yet cold enough to make the coffee cool too quickly.

Saga is doing well. She keeps me neat and tidy. Especially in the area directly under the dining table. She makes sure that nothing has been dropped that is even remotely edible.

I am doing well. My knee is on the mend. I am back to all normal activities with the only lingering after-effect of my torn ACL being that if I sit too long my knee is stiff and needs to be stretched and babied for the first few steps. I try and get-up and walk around regularly while I am at the office.

I guess that is it for now. I hope that your morning is pleasant and the rest of your day is too!

Don Bergquist - 22-August-2005 - Lakewood, Colorado

Don, The Animal

It is just about midnight on Wednesday night and I am just returning home from a party. I hadn't known there was a party nor had I planned on attending a party, it was just fortuitous that I happened into it. My neighbor, Chuck, sent two of his minions by earlier and coerced me into attending the party.

I'm not really sure which to discuss first, the coercion, or why I was partying with people half my age until midnight on a school night... No! Let's try the moniker as a starting point.

About two years ago, my neighbors at the time were Andy and the two Jakes. (Sounds like a band almost.) I was sitting at home one afternoon, reading out on my deck on a temperate late winter afternoon when one of the Jakes (I never did have last names, so I just thought of them as the two Jakes, or if I needed to specify one or the other, it was either the little Jake, or the big Jake in reference to one's diminutive stature and the other's tall stature.) was dumping a box of empty beer bottles in the trash. He came over and introduced himself to me, my deck being within the line of sight of the trash bins.

"Hi!" he said, coming up to but respecting the fence line, "I'm your neighbor, Jake, and we're having a St. Patrick's day party next week. Please feel free to come." So I did. It was a pretty good party. There was a corned-beef brisket, and lots of snacks and beer. It was not until much later I was to discover that they were all (just barely) legal to drink! Andy, whose parents own the townhouse that backs onto mine, and the two Jakes throw a heck of a party! We were doing keg stands and shots until the wee hours. The next afternoon when I got home from work, little Jake saw me coming back from the mailbox with my mail. He was looking a bit green around the gills. "Didn't go to work, eh?" he said.

I said that I had, that I was just getting home and he asked me if I had come home early because I was still hung-over. "Eh?" I said, "Oh, no. I am at the office every morning by 06:00 so I am usually home around three."

"You must have had a horribly unproductive day." He concluded, obviously nursing a hangover himself.

"Nope." I assured him, "I was raring to go when I walked into the office at 05:45 and worked straight through. Why?"

"You're an Animal!" he concluded and by the time the next party came around, all these kids, half my age, were calling me "Don, the Animal."

This evening, as I was sitting reading, I heard a yell for outside, it was one of the guys from next door. They told me that they were having an eighties party and needed Don the Animal to make it complete. So I came upstairs, put on a couple layered polo shirts, put on my blazer and pushed the sleeves up to the elbows, added a pair of khakis and some shares and headed off to the party. It was a bit unnerving to be the only person there wearing something that they had actually owned in the eighties!

It was a fun party though, this one person was wearing a parachute suit and looked like Michael Jackson. But as I pointed-out, when Thriller was made, Michael Jackson was still black! There was a passable Ozzie Osborne, and a couple pretty good Cindie Laupers. I was, however, the only person there who had been aware of what was going on in the eighties. When I mentioned that I had been the age of the oldest person in the room when I graduated from college in 1984, they all bought me a beer and the party was well, and truly, under way!

But like Cinderella's coach, I will be turning into a pumpkin at midnight so I headed home a few minutes ago, got ready for bed and decided to make a rare late night blog entry. I love the fact that I am popular with people half my age! It is not as if they are inviting me to keep me from complaining, of the four units in this building, I am NEVER the one who complains. The two people on the ends do. One far more than the other, mind you. So I have to conclude that they just like partying with me. Ah! I now understand the aphorisms that my advisor in college used to throw at me - the ones that I swore I would never use. Yes, college is one of the best times of your life, but then, what part of your life isn't?

Live up, everyone! I hope today is the best of your life and if it isn't, do something to make it so!

Don Bergquist - 17-September-2005 - Lakewood, Colorado.

Weather Report (of a sort...)

The recent rains have been very kind to my garden!

My Morning Glories are just bursting to take over everything in sight. The aspen tree just beyond the fence was sheathed in a layer of Morning Glories when I returned from the United Kingdom. I had to do a quick pruning of the Morning Glories to stop them from becoming the Colorado equivalent of kudzu.

This morning, after walking the dog, packing my lunch, and chatting briefly with my neighbor, Lynn about what a mooch Saga is, I noticed how lovely the green of the grass and the lush vines were. I grabbed my camera and took some pictures of the Morning Glories and the Columbine on my way to the bus stop.

This afternoon they are calling for more thunder storms and warm high temperatures. I am sure that the jungle will explode with growth this afternoon and evening.

I hope that your environment is conducive to your growth wherever you are today!

Don Bergquist - 16-August-2005 - Lakewood, Colorado

Happy Birthday, Denis!

This morning's greetings are going out to by big brother, Denis!

Happy Birthday, Denis!

Whether or not you know it brother, I have always looked-up to you. You may have been a bit of a pain when we were kids, always knowing everything, always being the one in the right place at the right time and all, it was daunting living in your shadow. The only thing that made it a bit easier to take was that we were both living in Mary's shadow and that made things a bit easier to take!

This old picture of you on the wing of Uncle Speed's plane is one that always brings a smile to my face... it shows that even then you were bound to flight high. (...or had you already been up at the time this picture was taken?)

I guess the only thing I had over you when we were growing up is that I never got carsick. I always loved vacations and could ride in the back to the station wagon for days without complaint. Of course, I didn't read nearly as much as you did back then so who know? Maybe that made the difference!

Well, here's to you, Denis!

Happy Birthday!

Don Bergquist - 15-August-2005 - Lakewood, Colorado